Many of you know my brother and SIL went to India for surrogacy a few years back. You may not know  they have been the subject of a documentary chronicling that journey. Made In India premiered at the Toronto Hot Docs Film Festival this May to standing room only crowds. The video above is a local news channel interviewing them.

Riley will be 2 in six days. She is amazing.

So hai…. Been awhile since I posted. Went on the most fantabulous vacation evar and found out our offer was accepted for the house we wanted. Took just 8 fun-filled months. Funny thing….. Last year we got the call about the house we got (then lost) on the last day of our vacation. This year same story. Jase’s aunt is THE best good luck charm! Everything seems to be working out so far. Knowing our luck it wont last long LOL. We’re all refusing to get excited but I know many of you were waiting to see what the answer from the bank was. Now I distract you all with new pics!

Seth 2010 -A Space Odyssey.

Becca 2010- Dazed and Confused about what her homework assignment was.

Kyle 2010- A cuter smile was never smiled.

Trying to become one with technology.

RELEASE THE FIRE ANTS!!!!

and I am okay with where I am at.

The Bad:

I have had a few minor set backs with the non-smoking plan. I am still holding at about 10 cigarettes a day but I have hit a wall. A big wall. I just cannot push my timer higher without freaking out to the point of a panic attack. I have “cheated” a few times and went ahead and smoked when there was 10-20 mins left on the clock. I think it’s hit so hard this week because it’s THE WEEK. The week women dread and men fear. Jase and I have talked about all this at length and he’s been so damn supportive it makes me want to squeeze him until his eyes pop. We’re going to let 1 hour 50 minutes become my new normal. That’s usually 10-12 cigs per day depending on how long I am awake. Once my nicotine level evens out and 10 really becomes my new normal I will begin upping the timer again.

It really is a process and not a race. I am sorry if I have disappointed any of you but I am damn proud of myself and how I’m handling this.

The Good:

I am down from almost two CARTONS a week to one carton EVERY 2 WEEKS. That’s amazing. I have not have any full out meltdowns emotionally because for once I am going about quitting the right way. I’ve had a few panic attacks but they were mostly internal and I didn’t lash out at anyone so I consider it a win.

I have also switched from Light 100’s to Ultra Light 100’s. This cuts my nicotine intake from .7 mg a cig to .4 mg a cig. I’m still off the patch unless I have a really bad day like today. I just cut the patch into 1/4 and the day went a bit smoother. Instead of 21 mgs of nicotine coursing through my blood it’s 5mg plus whatever I am smoking. MUCH BETTER!

Someone likened me to a compulsive over eater. At first I didn’t get it but the more we talked about it the more it made sense. I’d smoke when I was happy, sad, nervous, excited, angry, tired, bored, stressed, etc. The more I smoked the more helpless I felt to change it/beat it and I would smoke more.  I began to hate myself and what I had become and what it was doing to my family. Second hand eating never hurt anyone. If I had treated food like I did my cigarettes I would’ve been 500 pounds or more or dead. Quitting smoking is like dieting. It’s not a one time goal it’s a complete lifestyle change and I have to take the journey to find Heather the healthy non-smoker who possesses the coping skills necessary to handle stress and emotions without reaching for a pack of cigarettes. Kicker is that I hate having emotions. Happy is ok but any other I avoid at all costs. I like to shut down and become comfortably numb.

The BLOATED:

I have gone from drinking  0 ounces of water a day (cokes only) to drinking 168 ounces of water a day. That’s freaking 1.3 GALLONS!) It was 96 ounces until I got a much bigger water bottle last night. The secret for me is having a bottle with a built in straw. For some reason it’s easier to suck down copious amounts of water than to try and chug it. I am cheating a little and using a little Propel powder in it. Again, going from one extreme to another takes time and some getting used to. I will start putting less powder in and get used to plain water in time. I’ve had 1 Coke in the past 2 weeks and the surprising part is I didn’t get caffeine withdrawal at all. WOOOOOO score one for Heather! I have a huge Brita bottle with a spigot and got another cheap plastic 2.5 gallon jug to put the filtered water in while the Brita filters even more water.

I’ve had to get a mild diuretic to help get rid of all the water I am retaining. I’ve never retained water IN MY LIFE and I wouldn’t recommend it. What everyone failed to mention is that it would take around 24 hours to kick in so I was up and down at the butt crack of dawn running to the bathroom.

The daily horrific heartburn is gone and my ulcer has really chilled the fuck out.

If you’ve made it this far then you’re my hero and I couldn’t have done any of this without your support and I love you for it. Thank you!

Now I will distract you with beauty!

Becca? Thinking? This will not end well for anyone.

Mom let me wear makeup today! Squeeee!

Pretty Princess!

Becca's New Outfit. Long Skirt Version

Shortened Skirt Rolled At The Waist.

My Baby's First Pair Of Heels!

They may or may not appreciate being outed on my blog. They may want to shield their faces in shame. Too damn bad!

Like it or not I am the fruit of their loins and there is no exchange policy.

My parents are awesome. They did their best to raise me right and the end product isn’t their fault.

They’ve always stood behind me and caught me when I stumbled.

I wouldn’t be who I am or where I am today without their guidance and love. They mean the world to me.

They are my best friends.

Love you guys!!!

To bring you more crap that will rot your brain!

Yay my shows are back with new episodes! Stupid holidays messing with my viewing pleasure.

Becca is chasing Kyle around the house trying to pry the last Mo’Mint out of his grubby little hands.This could get UGLY. It’s damn fun to watch, though.

My postcards had a slight hiccup. Apparently I am not photo edit savvy enough to know what resolution I should be sending them. I am trying my hardest to get it right so I can continue my journey into your home! So more time for people to sign up! I’ve already found a new blog to read because of this!

Please send all your sticky thoughts to Miracle in the Making. She’s on the verge of finding out if this Clomid cycle worked. Please let it have worked. Please,please, please!

I joined Kristin’s Book Challenge and pledged to read 50 books this year. I put a bookshelf on my side bar so I can keep track of what I’ve read. Already 3 books in YAY! I’m just happy that any book qualifies and it doesn’t have to be Shakespeare or any “deep thought” stuff. I like my fluff!

I’m not officially on a diet but I am trying to lose weight and stop eating so much candy and snack items. Next up, cutting down on my Coke intake. My ulcer will thank me. Don’t worry no tofu or bean sprouts for me in the near future.

I have become an Apples to Apples addict. I make Jase and the kids play with me for hours. I blame Aunt Debi for introducing me to this game. I’ve bought the Party Crate and the A2A Junior game. Now I downloaded the online version. Addict!

Christmas at our house is actually never at our house. The years my ex has the kids I get them a few days after Christmas so we never decorate or put up a tree. The years I have them we go up to my parents  house  so again, no need for a tree or any Christmas related things.

This year we are going to celebrate our non-traditional family by making new non-traditional traditions. We’re going to make Christmas fun and wacky! You guys still with me? Okay, here we go!

I’ll share with you today “Step One”.

Cotton Candy Pink Christmas Tree! 3 feet high!

The Magical “Christmas Fairy”!

Stay tuned for Step Two! Forget the old, tired  Santa and Reindeer shtick. How about some festive Dalek and Star Trek decor?!

This was brought to you by my 200th post!

No, Jase isn’t trading me in for a younger healthier wife. I know! I’m surprised too!

I wanted to share with you some pictures of my “Drunk Driver Target”. This is the van I was in when that idiot took out an SUV and shoved said SUV into the back of us while we were at a complete stop. No, that’s not chrome on the brake light it’s duct tape. It’s all the rage down here in Florida as the must have accessory for cars.

Note the rear door is in no way latched. It is only held down by some wench straps and sticks open about 2-3 inches. This allows all the nice cold air to get sucked out the back while I drive.

Then when it rains all that lovely moisture gets into all the fabric making the inside smell FABULOUS! That moisture mixed with heat has allowed the glue on the headliner to weaken thus I get to drive around with a smelly, moldy, headliner hat. I’m so chic! Take that church ladies!

It’s not entirely road worthy. A quick 2 mile trip to the store tops. So we’ve had to squish all the kids into Jase’s Elantra when we picked them up from their dads. Let me tell you, that’s an hour long trip where I threaten to leave them on the side of the road at least 10 times. Our first order of business after getting a house was to get a “new” van then later down the road Jase a “new” car.

Take it all in.

Now I would like to share with you the awesomeness that is Jase’s aunt. You’ve heard of her here before as the glue that holds the whole family together and the one who accepted the kids and I into said family with open arms. Who other than an awesome person would allow someone to borrow their vehicle to take a 10 hour (each way) trip for a week?

She called Jase last night to make him an offer we couldn’t refuse. She was driving home in her brand new van she’d bought minutes before and wanted to know if we wanted her Kia. The same Kia we borrowed to go to MS. The van I coveted the moment I got behind the wheel. The van that has rear A/C so the kids won’t be beet red and soaked after 5 mins. SOLD!!!!!

This isn’t a picture of the actual van but it’s exactly what it looks like.

The candy has been sorted and most of it eaten. Jase and I took our Trick or Treat Toll. We get first pick out of their loot as payment for walking up and down the streets carrying their crap. Sadly, we didn’t get pictures as I forgot the camera. Just look at last years pic because it’s basically how they looked this year. Tyson’s Haunted House rocked this year and Sheldon will never look at black spandex again without shuddering. This is him in his gimp suit.*

Sheldon hid in various corners as people came into the partitioned off porch area to get to the candy bowl. You really couldn’t tell him from the wall until he came up and tried to hug you. We were two blocks away and still heard the screams. It was awesome. I can’t wait until next year!

*Photo is stolen from Tyson’s FB page.